Where on earth do I belong?
I have taken up space on this orb
for nearly seventy years, many
of these spent in utter confusion,
lost to myself, leaving many
others to wonder, who is this being?
As if I, myself held the answers,
aware of my motivations, I did not;
And I get it, perhaps I am not solitary
in these musings, perhaps it is a product
of age and experience, duration
in a life spent with memories,
reflections, condensation of thirty-
five years of living in the Maine woods,
a home my heart returns to endlessly,
though those days are gone forever;
Even if I could return, I would not,
desecrated forests, polluted waters
where once I swam and floated
without human observation,
contemplating the brilliance
of streaming light from heavenly bodies
not yet emerging into view, swimming
with loons, their young paddling
behind parents, my future not something
I contemplated, rather encountered
often haltingly, day by day, headlong
and too often blindly as if rushing
into blackness, life happening to me,
instead of crafting it, shaping it
into a thing of my own choosing;
And now I sit, watching clouds gather,
listening to birds and the distant thump
of a garbage truck going about its run,
collecting refuse we cannot use,
all the detritus left as a product
of living in the twenty-first century,
too many people, how has it come
to this where, despite wilderness
surrounding me, my thoughts drift
constantly to the unnecessary waste,
not only refuse, but resentments, pain
of those growing up, not knowing years
in human form are precious and short,
building castle walls of separation,
unforgiveness, and it will be gone without warning to all of us, in the blinking eyes left to observe what once seemed an endless, open, uncluttered road of possibilities.
I love this Bela. 🙏🏼💐💕 Sweet memories bring our sense of loss to the fore. So much is behind us now. Yet happiness is always present when we pause to welcome it.
Yes, and sterling points you make, Val. This poem wanted to be written, and it ended how it did. But happiness needs to be a focal point, now more than ever. Thanks for clarifying that. 🙏💓
Have you murdered someone? 🙂
🤓🤪😂 always the potential, but i have done due diligence with my Shadow for years now. Hopefully not! 😘
Beautiful!
Thanks, luv. 🙏
Wow what a sky Bela.. and what wonderful crafted thoughts you turn into words Bela..
Argh where indeed does time fly to.. And yes the years all too soon roll by as we watch the changing landscape…
Change is something we cannot stop.. HOW we change it, it up to us…. Let us hope we have instilled a legacy into our children’s children to take better care and to respect our Earth Mother than many within our generation have done..
Sending love and hugs my friend <3
Thanks so much, Sue. And yes. We can only do what we can do. Back to the garden! 🪴🌎💕
In answer to your first-line query: ‘Everywhere’ seems the only answer that makes sense to me. Hope you are faring well, my dear Lady of the Finest Words.
You must’ve felt a psychic tug from me lately. In between visitors and gardening and such, I’ve been meaning to write you an email and will do so soon. Thank you as always for your reading and wise responses. I’ll find out how everything else is going privately. 😉💕💕💕
It’s 5am and dark, I’m restless, awake, but it’s too early to go for my walk, so instead I read and mull over thequestions you ask. I’m already into my seventies and still have few answers. Good morning, Bela, from across the pond. 🙋♂️
Good morning, Ashley. Do you know, the older I get, and I am nearly 70, the less I know and the less I am sure about any damn thing. So you are not alone in that.
There are many, many changes afoot these days, globally and cosmically and certainly within our own human race. Planets are shifting and aligning, and change is definitely in the air. And we are at a place in time we have never been before. It is either continue as we have, consuming with little regard for earth and her resources and often one another, or we will, as a species, surely face holocene extinction. The planet of course is in peril as well. For me, trying to sort out answers is futile. I try as best I can to stay free of fear as the old top-down patriarchy crumbles. To remain attuned and aligned to collaboration and community, to help where I can. In this way, I believe we are creating a parallel society; one in which everyone is included. This might be helpful in sorting out what I understand so far: https://youtu.be/q-_5tRXOt3c
Both of these women are people I listen to on a regular basis to stay sane.
Anyhow, perhaps this is more than you asked for in your simple response to my post, but I hope you find it helpful, and wish you all the best. 🙏❤️
Thanks, Bella, your answer resonates with me. I used to think I had a map of the world, my world, the layout of the world but increasingly before retirement in 2014 the map, metaphorical of course, just wasn’t right. The church was no longer on the hill, the school was nowhere to be found, and the road layout was not as I remembered it and I didn’t recognise anyone! I was lost! Still am, I suppose. My map was useless, obsolete! Somehow the world had changed. I shall check the link you sent and get back to you. Meanwhile, keep well and safe. 🌹🙋♂️
Thank you. Yes, it is sad for me to witness so many changes in the world I have inhabited (and beyond) in this lifetime. But what else to do but forge on into the new, with our hopes and dreams intact, if altered from those of our youth? My hope is that there are enough of us in the collective who will create more of what you and I perhaps wish to see. There are far too many people anymore to ever hope things can return to what they were, so it will be interesting to see what will be, in the wake of our collective vision. For sure, we are not alone. Peace. 🙏❤️