Because thoughts become things.
Intention is essential.
— Laureli Ivanoff
At seventy-two, my thoughts on living a very long life
are necessarily different
than they were at forty.
I have lived long enough to watch friends fall ill
and die.
Long enough to witness the suffering born not only
of disease,
but of confused priorities—
of people unaware of their own unexamined lives,
their own lack of self-reflection.
Age has not narrowed my vision.
It has widened it.
I know now, to the marrow,
how small our petty dramas truly are—
including those perpetuated by others
in the name of protection, loyalty, or fear.
Attachments tighten.
Hearts close.
And the world shrinks to whatever we believe
will keep us safe.
Recently, an elder friend died—
not gently,
but drowning in her own body fluids.
She had traveled a great distance
to be near those she loved,
only to discover that once she arrived,
the surrounding dramas took precedence
over time spent simply being with her.
Many study expansive awareness.
Few practice it.
The lotus position does not prepare us
for the moment when compassion costs us
convenience.
Do we see how we affect others?
Do we care enough to look honestly
at our own failings?
Do we ever ask
what we might one day regret?
Those who live with eyes open—
who tend their bodies and spirits,
who choose joy despite having seen
the darker edges of human nature—
we become the elders.
We face the road ahead
with either quiet excitement
or unspoken dread.
We are the ones who must live with
the consequences of choosing longevity
in a culture that increasingly
marginalizes its aging.
Each morning, I wake with optimism
about what the day might bring.
At night, I fall asleep wrapped
in the steady love of my longtime companion,
secure in the knowledge
that our needs are met—
while so many lie awake
fearing how they will endure
the years ahead.
I look forward,
but not naively.
I know that any sunrise
may carry news of loss—
another passing,
another rupture.
If these thoughts do not visit you at forty,
trust me:
they will arrive
sooner than you expect.
And so—
be kind.
Be aware.
We are a small planet
in a vast cosmos,
yet our lives matter.
Our thoughts carry weight.
Our choices ripple outward.
Love unreservedly.
See one another clearly.
So that when the end comes—
yours, or someone you love—
there will be nothing left undone,
nothing left unsaid,
and no regrets
worth carrying forward.
Tide going out, Santa Cruz ~ 2017
I am replying but I do not have a profound observation. All that travels through my head is gratitude for being here, gratitude for being my age, gratitude for being married to Jean, gratitude for being fit and healthy, gratitude for having wild deer to feed in the morning, and supreme gratitude for having Mount Sexton so close, and supreme gratitude for the beautiful trees on our property. That’s all!
I would say your observations are spot on! We all perceive things through our own lenses. If yours is gratitude, I wouldn’t argue with that for a heartbeat. I am likewise profoundly grateful pretty much at all times. Counting our blessings is always in season! ❤️
Amen to that… 💕
🙏 mahalo, Eliza. 💗
Thank you. Always words of wisdom from your lips.
Mahalo, my friend. Lotsa years of observing on this planet. 😉♥️
I see many things more clearly, but that does not stop me from making the same mistakes–I’m just more aware of them. Slow to evolve….(k)
Kerfe, I think all we humans are slow to evolve. And I never thought of this as a race, more like a marathon of endless duration. 😝 I also don’t think there’s any right or wrong about how we do the journey, only that we engage with it. Meaningfully if we can manage it. And that you’ve become more aware? Pretty sure that’s the ultimate. 🌺🙏♥️
It’s an interesting process or sure!
Indeed!
To wake with optimism is a great gift! As I get older, I do believe I feel more optimistic – in the sense that I know what is most important and can focus on it. It is that sense of focus, maybe – eliminating the extraneous – that makes me feel my life has become more expansive. Life feels rich and layered in ways it did not when young…
As always, thanks for your words 😊
And, as always, thanks for Your words. Always well considered, and I know you live them. Isn’t it ironic how more focus, which by the nature of the word, tends to do its opposite, resulting in that expansive feeling? I find this true, as well, VL. 🙏🏽💗